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Bismillahi ar-rahmani ar-rahim

Tawrah, Genesis 11:31,32

Terah took his son Abram, his grandson Lot son of Haran, and his daughter-in-law Sarai, the wife of his son Abram, and together they set out from Ur of the Chaldeans to go to Canaan. But when they came to Harran, they settled there. Terah lived 205 years, and he died in Harran.

Ibrahim (as) obediently followed his father from Ur (in Iraq) to Harran (in southern Türkiye) and cared for him there until the end of his days. But as we saw, when he was put in a situation where he had to choose between his father and Allah, Ibrahim (as) made the right decision.

You may say “The father of Ibrahim was a polytheist, but our fathers are not. Therefore, they must be obeyed without reservations.” It is most certainly virtuous to honor one’s parents, and it is expected when they are Muslims.

The question though, should be asked. What does it mean to be a Muslim? Is someone entitled to demand unrestrained obedience from their children simply because an imam whispered the Shahadah to their ear after they were born?

Who is a Muslim?

1. one who was born to Muslim parents
2. one who can repeat the Shahadah and al-Fatiha
3. one who daily submits to Allah

All of the above, at least according to fiqh (juridically), are correct answers. The ulama generally agree that one does not stop being a Muslim by not obeying all of their religious duties. But there is a difference between a legal definition and seeking the actual meaning of the word Muslim.

A Jew is defined by belonging by blood to the bani Israil (children of Israel). If one wants to join their community, they must prove descendancy from Jews on their mother’s side. A non-Jew cannot become a Jew. Even if they attend services in the synagogue every week, obey all the ordinances of the Tawrah and wish to join the Jewish community, they can, at best, be accepted as proselytes but never as Jews.

A Christian is defined by submission to Allah and by following Isa al-Masih (Christos is a Greek word for Al-Masih - The Anointed One, meaning the Elected One), and by adhering to the Injil, as well as the Tawrah. Race or ethnicity plays no role. One does not need to be a Farangi (Westerner) or an Armenian to be a Christian.

What is the definition of a Muslim?

The word Muslim is based on the Arabic root s-l-m and is derived from the verb aslama. The meaning of this word is to submit and we all understand this to mean submission to Allah. You have probably known this as long as you can remember. The question, though, is not whether you know it or not. The question is: Do you live it? Are you submitted to Allah?

Mashallah, it is a blessing to be born to a family of believers. But the question: “Are you submitted to Allah?” has little to do with the religion of your family or your ummah. It is a personal question; a question about your attitude; a question which cannot be answered once and forever. One needs to ask themselves every day: Am I submitted to Allah or not? It is a question one needs to ask not only when entering a mosque, but also at work, at leisure or when relating to other people. Am I submitted to Allah? Or do I merely belong to a religion, but do my own will or that of another human being?

That is why one can’t demand or expect blind obedience only because they were born a Muslim. Allah is to be obeyed first. People, even fathers and mothers, are to be honored all the time; but they are to be obeyed as long as they submit to Allah, and their words and lives show it. Allah expected this from Ibrahim (as) and He expect no less from us.

Am I submitted to Allah?

Do I submit to Allah daily?

Am I submitted to Allah right now?